Many of us put our focus on what is ‘wrong’ with us, our children, our family, our friends, our work, our environment; and by doing so we continue to create negative experiences again and again.

Let’s use an example

One evening a huge argument erupts at home. There is yelling, tears and storming off. Then six months later the family is sitting at the dinner table and you start to share about your experience that evening. Some family members focus on the negative feelings and the angry words that were shared. Other family members focus on how grateful they were, or that it didn’t really affect them. So what is the difference? Each family member had a different perspective on the same experience. What this is showing us is that every experience can be looked at from many different angles and that everyone has a choice as to perspective they are going to take.

So how do you change perspectives?

You change your focus by moving your attention to the positive parts of the experience, rather than the negative ones. In other words you look for the good. Here’s what I mean. Imagine your child is throwing a tantrum, hitting and screaming. You could focus on the tantrum; the hitting and screaming and get caught up with it. Or you could take a step back and watch it all from further away as if you were watching a play, at the same time you could remember all the things you love about them. In the first scenario you are likely to enter the argument and start screaming at them. In the second scenario you will be much calmer and your child is likely to calm down much faster and move onto something else.

8 ways to take a new perspective

Here are some ideas of what you can do to step away and take another perspective:

1. Stop and take a step away from where you are to view it from a different perspective.
2. Breathe deeply, read my article for some breathing ideas more
3. Go outside in nature take a moment to connect with your senses and notice what is going on around you.
4. Become the actor in the play rather than the victim. Become the observer, watch yourself playing the part.
5. Change the energy, for example put on some music and dance
6. Ask yourself ‘What could I do differently right now?’ and then act on it.
7. Grab and essential oil like ‘Joy’ and inhale it deeply three times.
8. Have a ‘LifeLine Technique’ session to clear the past that is clouding your experiences.

As you find new perspectives in every part of your life, and start to focus on what is “right” with you, your children, your family, your friends, your work, and your environment. You will begin to have positive experiences again and again.

Article by Karin Amali